A quick assessment of my current personal condition, considering what is happening around me and His work in my own heart, all in truth and reality.
The last two weeks have brought demands on different fronts. There has been the unusual events of attending conferences, getting a new part time job, and preaching extra sermons. There has also been the regular issues of disciple-making in a culturally diverse setting. And then, there are the personal and family challenges.
It has been exhausting, with a small room to breath right before we get started with the Summer, which brings Camp, a new sermon series, training for our leaders, and travel.
For me, it is the weight of the human factor that wears me down. I am sad – and angry – by the way our people live their lives, by he way I am still dealing with a lack of holiness. I really, really dislike wasted opportunities, and they are a common occurrence in my context.
What makes the whole situation difficult to handle is the idea that all this work, all those disappointments, all that stress and pressure are, somehow, not normal.
Yeah, right; not normal.
I am convinced, more and more, that my call to serve the Triune God of the Universe come with a perpetual state of tension, stress, and demands.
I am not giving up.
I am not being negative.
But I think I am admitting what is true and real.
I recently had a conversation with my wife and kids, about the many places I would like to visit. They were surprised when I told them that, even when I have all these particular places in mind, I know for sure I won’t be able to visit them. There are things I would like to do, obtain, experience but I know it will never happen.
I wish my service to others was simpler and less stressful, but I know that is not the reality.
Knowing and accepting this truth helps me to deal with reality correctly. It also helps me to see, enjoy, and share His Beauty in a more meaningful way.
He has thought me to be content, and I am – I really and truthfully am – because it is Him who gives me the strength I need. The One who resurrected Christ Jesus, God the Son, is the one removing the luster of this life and giving me a deeper desire for Him and for His eternity. He makes me more aware of the weight of glory, He fills my heart, He consoles me when I do not get the recognition I often believe I deserve, whispering “in Me you are blessed beyond measurement! Do you really need more than that?”
My concerns do not go away. I still have a ton to do. It’s not going to be easy, but that was never His promise. He promised to be with me, to love me and accept me. He promised to show me who He is, what’s the real condition of my heart, and what He is doing to solve it.
So far, He has delivered. Every. Single. Time.
That is the truth and reality I live in.
How I feel about my life
How are you doing? In the midst of life, in truth and reality can you see His Beauty?
Remember His grace, Follow Him in humility, Cultivate constantly, All in Cultural Diversity.